Depression is an ugly thing. It swallows you whole and you lose sight of anything that is nice and good. The worst part it can lead you to think that you don’t matter and it can lead to decision of a point of no return. This is a spoken word piece I made during college days. I re-wrote it and made a video on it.
As I Shatter In The End
Written by: Sese Ramirez
There is sorrow residing in my heart today
A spiral of loneliness entwines my feeling of happiness.
A maze of questions I can see, through the door of my thoughts.
I find myself in the middle of nowhere. No light. Nothing to hold on.
I feel lost in this emotional roller coaster happening in me.
Couldn’t understand why I’m laughing, why I’m still smiling.
At the same time, I’m crying. I am in despair.
I am wondering why.
My life is not perfect
I know its beautiful.
However, no matter how good it is, I still question…
Everything I’ve done in the past and everything that is now
Answers are not yet found.
Vague solutions I get to the problems that are set.
Doubtful decisions comes into my head.
I stand between a crossroad, not knowing where to go.
Hoping to choose the right way…
To myself, I want to say.
However, what is HOPE is but only an illusion?
What do I hang onto?
So if this HOPE is not my salvation, what do I expect of me?
But to shatter in the end.